Oh! she’s so short that she doesn’t even reach my shoulders.” That was the reason why I rejected the first marriage proposal that came my way. Though she had a beautiful dimpled face, long sooty lashes, raven hair and long nape, I couldn’t compromise on her stature. Despite her excellent academic background and etiquettes, I refused to accept the proposal.

Then, my restless relative who was more keen than me for my marriage asked me to meet Meena. I found her simple, robust and fluffy. Academically sound, somatically simple and attractive. Though taciturn, I found her intuitive from a short chit chat. On the question of whether she was ok, puckering my nose, I told the middleman, “Rather plump!” Then another relative asked me to meet Seema. While boasting of her beauty and totting up her talents, I was asked, “Is she ok?” I superciliously answered, “Rather lean!” Sorry, slim Seema, I rejected you because you were actually taller than me.

The hunt continued since I had to tie the knot at any cost that very month. I rejected the fourth proposal because I didn’t like the way she smiled and spoke. The family background was the reason for the fifth to be rejected. The sixth was skinny, seventh severely simple, eighth over-smart, ninth nervous, tenth taciturn, eleventh ugly, while the twelfth too weak academically. The poor hundredth got rejected because of her father’s economic status.

It was the hundred and first candidate that made me take a look at my own self. As I returned home after rejecting the hundred and first proposal, I received a call on my cell phone from the same lady. I got bewildered when she asked me to stand against a full-length mirror to reflect upon myself. She went on, “I don’t like lean and lanky guys like you!” You couldn’t compromise on my one single deficiency but I can’t compromise on your grimy eyes, rough face, and dappled gray hair and ...’’ Sorry, monsieur, I can’t marry a person who treats women as objects.” I eventually realised my mistake. Thank you Ina for opening my inner eyes! And sorry Hema, Seema, Meena, Reema... for having rejected you. You all are beautiful, brilliant and perfect pulchritudes. I now unconditionally want to marry any of you. Any takers?