Living in balance physically, emotionally and spiritually is the source of energy

and joy

Inside every individual exists a powerful capacity for healing and transformation—to stand up for the true self. To accomplish this we have to free ourselves from the past story. When we release old hurts, we grow from that suffering and learn to recognise happiness. In other words, we let go to hold more! If the past has been painful, we must stop reliving it, playing the part of the victim in the story over and over again. Every time we relive a memory, especially a past argument, or an old hurt, we keep it alive in our spirits and in our bodies. For example, when I think about an argument I had with a friend many years ago, my heart will race, my face will flush and my stomach will tense up as though it were happening now. Not everyone is fortunate to have loving parents who are perfect and reasonable, like on TV.

Some of us were physically and mentally abused as children. Some of us were neglected and emotionally abandoned as children. Therefore it is time to change the story and re-parent the self! We are no longer children who are economically and physically dependent on our parents. We had no choice as a child, but we do now…

When we re-parent the self, we send a message to the mind and body that we are worth it, that we are special and that we deserve love. When a child is abused, he or she lives in a dark place where there is no room to breath or feel. This child grows up lacking self-esteem, feeling worthless and always looking for approval from parents and outside sources. Often the abuse experienced in childhood gets repeated in adult life using different characters: a lover, a boss or even a so-called friend.

Therefore in order to break the cycle, one has to shed the past story and create the present story. In the new story the abused child is determined not just to survive, but to thrive. He or she assumes responsibility for actions, is committed to health and fitness, and finds the way to realise limitations while cultivating capabilities. Easier said than done? Well, saying it and thinking it is a good beginning. Everyday one has to make a commitment to positive thinking. It is neither the win nor the loss that makes a person triumphant, only the feelings and perception one has regarding the self. Positive perception and self-affirmation is the first step to personal empowerment: I am good enough.

The next step is believing that one is lucky. The opposite perception of the victim. When one is lucky, even when one fails, he or she learns from failure or suffering to succeed in the future. When one is lucky he or she sees opportunities where other people do not even think to look. I have heard cancer survivors admit, “I am lucky to have had cancer because now I know how to live and I really appreciate life!” A lucky person feels empowered and in

control. When one believes in the self, he or she can banish self-doubts, persist in set

goals, and clear the path for accomplishment.

Living in balance physically, emotionally and spiritually is the source of energy and joy. Be kind to yourself everyday and create personal time and space. If you are too busy, then get rid of some of your activities, prioritise. We have compassion for others, even our pets. Make sure that you have compassion for yourself. — By Debbie Eisenstadt Mandel