JUST IN JEST

A local newspaper ran a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic second line. Here are some of the entries they received.

I thought that I could love no other

Until, that is, I met your

brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.

Oh loving beauty you float with grace

If only you could hide

your face

Kind, intelligent, loving

and hot;

This describes everything

you are not

I want to feel your sweet

embrace

But don’t take that paper

bag off of your face

I love your smile, your

face, and your eyes -

Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

I see your face when I am dreaming.

That’s why I always wake

up screaming

My love, you take my

breath away.

What have you stepped in

to smell this way

My feelings for you no words can tell,

Except for maybe “go to hell”

What inspired this amorous rhyme?

Two parts vodka, one part lime — Hi Lama