CREDOS : Shyness in men

A relationship usually asks a lot of time and attention. Being involved with someone demands that you focus as much on the other as on yourself. You cannot work out a meaningful relationship into your busy life without some adjustment to your routine.

It might help to remember that a relationship keeps your soul alive. Through its demands and struggles, you become more of a person. But this process isn’t neat and orderly. It will doubtless conflict with your smooth-running life and your careful plans. There’s no doubt that it’s worth the risk and the changes to your life, but those changes won’t be easy for you.

Being shy with women can be a big problem, especially when shyness is extreme. But shyness can also be a strength. There are many ways of being a strong and interesting

person, and being shy rather than outgoing is one of them. We can love and be attentive and enjoy life. In fact, shyness is often just a way of keeping the lid on a powerful love of life and deep desire for sex and companionship.

Many women like some shyness in a man. Maybe they understand that there’s a lot of passion hidden behind that veneer of reserve. But the shyness has to be real, not feigned, and it has to be changing all the time. It isn’t a good idea to hide behind shyness, or use it as an excuse not to live or love. It’s who you are at the moment. Accept it, but then go on and become an even more interesting and varied person. —