It is the truth that women are not safe at their home where they are supposed to be the safest. I have found many women talking about mental harassment they have faced at home because of the dowry, but they cannot come forward to share their stories.

One of my friends demanded a diamond necklace and other sets of diamond jewelry and expensive furniture, clothes and other necessary assets from her middle class father for her wedding. According to her, she did so because she wanted prestige and respect in her husband’s home. Enough dowry would help her feel safe, secure her place at her husband’s home and the in-laws cannot raise their voice against her regarding a dowry, according to her. Her father sold his house and arranged for her daughter’s wedding. This reflects the horrible condition of society. If parents cannot produce the demanded dowry, the in-laws frequently harass the girl. In such cases for the happiness of their daughter parents are compelled to provide the demanded dowry.

People start to save for their daughter’s wedding as soon as their daughter is born. It seems people who have daughters don’t  have the right to enjoy their earnings for themselves. The dowry system is more prevalent in the Tarai region. In Kathmandu too one  can notice varieties of jewellery given to the  in-laws of daughters.

No one feels good to give their hard-earned money to other people. No one feels happy to sell or mortgage their property. I have never found any parents of grooms being happy from what they get from the bride’s family. They do not feel shame to ask for dowry but they do so for not producing enough dowry from the girl’s side. They should keep in mind that if their son is not capable of earning for himself then he should not think of getting married at that time.

Brides should bring enough dowry and they are expected to be qualified as well. Parents of grooms also want the girl to be beautiful regardless of how handsome their son is. Here I wonder, are all the boys perfect? They say that they need an ideal bride, so what may be a criterion for an ideal bride? Is it that she should bring huge sums of money or should she have good behavior?

According to the law, those who force dowry can be imprisoned for up to 30 days. The Domestic Violence Crime and Punishment Act, 2008, describes violence as any form of physical, mental, sexual and economic abuse.