Opinion

Change has to start from you

Change has to start from you

By Priti Dhopte

Once when my sister-in-law and I had some misunderstanding, my brother told me that I should change my thinking. Well, it was a shock to me. It took me some time to come out of it until I attended a life skills training programme. In the journey of life, we are so accustomed to seeing, hearing and imbibing the weakness of others that it has become a natural habit. Despite making resolutions not to see the fault of others, we tend to repeat it. My father always points faults at my mother and me, but I always thought that at some point in the future he would change. We always say we shouldn’t do this or that, but what we should do, think or see cannot happen naturally. For instance, if some empty place is not used properly, then it gives birth to junk and mosquitoes. The environment already has dirt, dust and mosquitoes. The empty place will be filled. Similarly, if we transform and try to see, listen and imbibe everyone’s virtues, duties, belief systems, occupations and intentions, then impurity will end by itself. Sometimes by looking at the mistakes of others, I would think they won’t change. However, that change has to start with me. And the way to do it is to see myself from the point of my specialty. For example, as a writer, I will perceive everything from the writer’s point of view of experiencing something new. As a motivational speaker, I will see what mistakes are generally committed or what new things I can learn from others in public speaking. If I see myself from the specialty of the self, it becomes easy to see others from the view of their specialties. Others do presume on the basis of their specialties and experiences rather than from our perspective.  This is how the unoccupied place gets filled up. It’s like celebrating the festival of Holi by burning the old belief system and creating a new one.  Instead of thinking someone is not going to change, we can ask ourselves, have I changed myself?  Let me become an example of transforming the self, which is like burning the demon Holi. Burning things means we have to come clean and pure from our old belief systems. It gives immense happiness when we change rather than wait for others to change. Life is full of challenges, and everyone grows with experience. Let’s help ourselves, inspire ourselves to change, which will ultimately help others to see and change.