We all go through certain phases in life - ups and downs. While most of us may have an innate tendency to suppress painful emotions, or fail to remember them until they emerge anew to bother us, the outcome is that you not only feel the pain, but also its clumsy scar with amplified intensity. This is like the cooked food you kept on the table and forgot to deposit in the refrigerator. You get to know about your gaffe only when it emits a lousy smell, after you return home from work. The next time, you would be careful - because, you would remember the stink.

You can deal with suppressed emotions in much the same manner. Just freeze them; but, don't put them in the freezer. There's no need for it. Because, once you empty the 'freezer' in your mind, you will begin to heal yourself and regain what you had lost in terms of your emotional health, too. Purging your 'frozen' emotional freezer is always the best thing you can do anytime in life, or career.

You'd call this your own spiritual self-help therapy. It is akin to beginning to 'feel' again, or understanding that you are what you are, or what you will be. The idea involves a host of steps and concepts, because it is not easy to pack-off your negative feelings. It is not like washing clothes, or utensils - for the detergent to scour the blemish. It is not like how you switch on the electric bulb, or switch it off when you want to. You do this by instinct.

Philosophers agree that it is far too difficult than we think to switch-on feelings generated in the present-moment. Because, we are 'hooked' to our old feelings, through the remote that works incessantly in our mind. Here goes - when we begin to re-establish, or balance, our emotions, we are invariably connected to our past.

Just think about it - our mind is smart enough to recognise whether, or not, we can handle our emotions at different levels. When we begin to re-focus, we initiate a measured process. Our mind will now begin to feel what it is made to feel. Agreed that it may have its own plan of action, independent of what the great seers, philosophers, spiritual masters, or self-help gurus, may have told us. Yet, the fact is when we endeavour to feel contented we transfer our thoughts and feelings to the 'mental chip' that regulates our emotions. We feel better - and, in synchrony with ourselves.

This process is analogous to what happens when you peel an onion, layer by layer, while filling your eyes with tears, thanks to the natural compounds that exist in the vegetable. It is like getting in touch with your feelings, one layer at a time. The more you peel, the more layers of your emotional feelings emerge. Eventually, you get down to the core of your being. Once this happens, you grow in common sense, wisdom and acceptance. The outcome is apparent - you are in control, and you also begin to understand yourself with greater awareness as regards your inner emotional quotient.

The precept, or percept, of beginning to feel again is not as complicated as it may sound. It requires the yielding and compliant feelings that you are now going to come to terms - with everything. Once you attain this level of acceptance, you will be able to recognise the futility of your past behaviour - running, or escaping, from reality and/or suppressed emotions.

We all go through this subtle process, knowingly, or unknowingly. Philosophers call this condition 'emotional release.' Ironically, however, most of us tend to get 'wedged,' with a tight knot, just before we are able to release such an emotion. Not all of us who manage to reach and get over this stage, and work on expressing ourselves, would be able to unwind fully.

Well, if any of us wants to complete the whole process, we need to 'let go' of our unwanted emotional baggage. For instance, there could be a rigid emotion that has gotten deeply entrenched within our psyche. It is not easy to relieve this emotion at the speed of thought. To 'let go' the emotion, we ought to reach a higher level - a stage that helps us to rediscover who we are. It is not that you would feel contented in purging this emotion, yes, but when you do, you will only be happy for it.

All of us have our fill of happiness, anger, sadness and disappointments. We all have a tendency to hold them close to our chest, too. We are scared to let them go fully. Because, we feel we would not be what we are without them lodging in our mind and behaviour. This, in effect, means we will remain where we are. This frightens our inner workings. So, we cling to our existing emotional condition. As days and months go by, we, instead of easing, activate such emotions with slanted effect.

Just picture that you are about to release your colourful kite with a lengthy thread attached to it. The kite will fly and sail freely - so long as you are in control of it. Emotions are somewhat like mental kites. The best thing that you can do is to let go your emotions like the kite. If you do, you will help yourself reach a state of emotional freedom - without realising how you untied the strings and/or sequence.

Once this happens, everything will change for you. You will feel lighter, more vibrant, more energetic, and eager to going ahead full steam in everything you do. This connotes the whole process of holistic healing - a process of feeling your breath, with your feet placed on the ground.

Nidamboor is a wellness physician, independent researcher and author