MIND YOUR MANNERS : Be a gentleman
MIND YOUR MANNERS : Be a gentleman
Published: 12:00 am May 30, 2004
Men should not act like robots and be slaves to etiquette, but some basic good manners will go a long way in helping you during your ascent to the top. Follow these simple tips and people will perceive you as a man of good breeding and taste, hence a man they wish to associate and conduct business with. Not to mention the fact that the ladies are always quite pleased to meet a real gentleman.
Always be polite:
Even if you don’t like someone, there is no need to lower yourself to their level. Be polite and courteous; show that you’re the better man.
Do not curse:
Swearing is a big no-no. It shows that you don’t have the vocabulary to express your thoughts appropriately. Furthermore, it is always very crude and impolite to be vulgar.
Do not speak loudly:
When you speak loudly, it raises the stress level among company. It always implies that you can’t reason with people and rely on “brute force” to get your point across. It also draws attention — negative attention.
Do not lose your temper:
When you lose your temper, you are showing everyone that you can’t control your emotions. If you can’t even control yourself, then how can you possibly control anything else? Keep your cool at all times (it won’t be easy but it is worth the effort) and people will take positive note of your level headedness.
Do not stare:
Ogling someone is the equivalent of psychological aggression. You don’t want to intimidate people for no reason.
Do not interrupt:
Let people finish what they are saying before adding your comments. Interrupting others is a sign of poor etiquette and a lack of social skills. If you want to come across as egotistical, you can do so by constantly interrupting. Do not spit: A lot of men do this almost subconsciously. Spitting is very crude and not too pretty to look at. Do not spit in public unless you want to look like you were raised in a sewer.
Respect your elders:
In fact, you should respect others as you would like them to respect you.
Now on to how to be a smooth gentleman with the ladies... Do not laugh at others’ mistakes:
This is perhaps one of the cruellest thing you can do. When you mess up, the last thing you want is for someone not only to bring it to your attention, but to ridicule you on top of that.
Wait for seating before eating:
When sitting down for a meal, you should wait until all the guests are properly seated and ready to commence the meal before eating. Everyone should start dining at the same time; this is a subtle but very important rule.
The basics of chivalry:
In addition to the aforementioned rules, gentlemen should follow these additional rules when in the presence of a lady. Chivalry may be on life support, but it is not dead yet. Be one of the few to keep this flame burning for many years to come.
Always open doors:
This is perhaps the most basic rule of male etiquette out there. It is also one of the easiest to follow so you have no reason to forget it. Whether she is about to enter your car, restaurant, club, or anyplace with a door, you should always hold it open. If there are many doors, then hold them open one after the other.
Help with her seat:
If an unaccompanied lady is sitting next to you, it is important that you help her be seated by pulling her chair out for her and gently pushing it back into place, with the lady seated of course.
Give up your seat:
If a lady arrives at the table and there are no available seats, you should stand up and offer yours to her.
Stand at attention:
Always stand when a lady enters or exits the room. This rule has been somewhat relaxed, so you can stand upon entrance but remain seated upon exit. Nonetheless, if you can do both, you should.
Give her your arm:
When escorting a lady (that you know) to and from social events,you should offer her your arm. This is a little more intimate, but serves well when walking on uneven ground — especially if she’s wearing high heels.
Ask if she needs anything:
This is one that most guys already do, but helps complete the gentleman in all of us nevertheless. When at social events, make sure to ask the lady if you can get her something to drink (or eat, depending on the event). Show her that you care about her comfort and needs.