Peoplespeak : Weddings: Say no to vulgar display of wealth
It is true that in Nepal marriage is still a once-in-a-life-time experience as compared to western world where most marriages often end up in divorce. So it makes sense that Nepalis want it to be an experience that will be remembered for a lifetime. But what we have to understand is that not all of us are tycoons so it does not make sense to spend all our money or take a lot of loan that cannot be paid back for a show-off-marriage like that of movie stars Abhishek and Aishwayra or Brangelina. Instead it can also be done in a simple way and parents of the newly wed couple can gift them the cash for further studies abroad or to start a business in their own country for their bright future rather than feeding those already fat 500 so-called jantis.
— Cool Cristofer, Pokhara
As we know weddings happen once in a life, so it should be done in a truly grand way that will be remembered for years to come. And when the days have passed, it will be remembered more and more. A grand wedding is unique in itself and will remain in the hearts of the people forever. As we know the economy the of people is increasing day by day, people want to celebrate their wedding in a grand way. So it would be better to have huge wedding instead of small and simple wedding.
— Suresh Jaiswal
Happiness increases when we share it with others. Marriage, being a bond between two people, who are supposed to spend the rest of their lives with each other, this is supposed to be the happiest occasion in the two people’s lives. And so there is a tradition of making marriage ceremony a grand event. This occasion provides an opportunity for people to come together and enjoy, for the organisers - family members - to learn the skills of management and many more. Talking in terms of money, human beings are meant to mould themselves according to different situations. That is why in my view the tradition of celebrating weddings in a grand way should continue.
— Sweta Rajpal
Nowadays, more than the rituals, traditions and customs, weddings have become a show-off business. The more extravagant the wedding, the higher the status of people among family, friends and society. So, instead of having a big drama by spending lakhs and lakhs of money, it would be better for the wedding couple to be blessed by family and friends for their togetherness and success. The money could be given to the couple who can utilise it for their necessities in the days to come. Wedding is truly a once in a life time thing, but let that relationship remain for lifetime even if the wedding is done in a simple manner, rather than have a grand wedding and not have the relationship last forever.
Marriage is not just two-three days of ceremony; it is not just an occasion, getting two people tied to each other is not just it. It is a life long relationship. So, it is not a question of how grand and extravagant a marriage ceremony is. It is how happy the couple can remain throughout the marriage. Therefore, it needn’t be expensive - a simple reception will do everybody good. Especially in our society, pomp and show during marriage has become
such an obsession that people go beyond their means for an extravagant marriage. And, of course, neighbours and rivals have to compete with a more lavish and luxurious party. This goes on and on. But, I think marriage is the last thing people should be spending a huge amount of money on.
— Rhea Gurung,
While talking about marriage ceremonies it is an immensely important social custom with all the sacred rituals performed. But in the name of weddings, we often see the flow of money used unnecessarily. In my opinion it is good to have wedding ceremonies and throw parties if we have enormous wealth or if we have the capacity. But in case of simple Nepalis, it is really a waste of time and money. Parents too should think about their own future instead of wasting all their assets in ceremonies. What are they going to do in old age? Just sit in a corner and lament about how much they spent? So, it’s good to throw parties with colours of joys and not just with money.
— Vivek Dhakal
Wedding is a once in a lifetime thing, and it will be remembered for years. I don’t agree with the system where people spend too much money for their wedding ceremony. They seem too hard to show they are rich. Nowadays people seem to marry dowry and not the bride. Without spending too much money we can still make the wedding special and memorable.
— Sandip Neupane
Wedding in a grand style leaves a great impression not only on those who are getting married but also on the family. That beautiful day itself is the sweetest gift for the new couple. Like a simple wedding, it won’t just be, ‘came and went.’ The day will be engraved in the minds and always bring a smile whenever the couple remembers it. “Well begun is half done,” so an extravagant opening day of a relationship will encourage them to have a better start on their eternal journey. It’s better not to waste the best day of one’s life in such a simple way that others look at you with a raised nose and a frowned forehead. Make it a day too cherish till your last breath, a day you can boast of.
Nonetheless, it doesn’t sound good that you got bankrupt after that day so one should be economical if you can’t afford. But try your best to make it as grand as possible even with minimal expenses.
— Sarose Khanal,
Since marriage is a once-in-a-lifetime thing, I personally feel it should be extravagant. This is the time when all the kith and kin gather, so it definitely calls for a celebration. However, one should not opt for an overly extravagant party that could make one’s entire lifetime miserable. It ought to be affordable, under ones budget, yet look lavish. I am eagerly waiting for the day to walk down the aisle and throw a magnificent party. That’s my ‘dream wedding!’
— Prinsa Shrestha, Ace Institute of Management
Spending an enormous amount of money in the name of wedding ceremony by making it really grand is what is in practice today. It would be far better if that amount were used for some good policies like insurance and so on. But it seems like people have lost their conscience and just seem to spend money without thinking if they can afford it or not. Basically, what we see here is organising a grand ceremony by taking loan for a show off ceremony for society. And the loan remains a burden when one is not able to pay such a huge sum. One must look at oneself when it comes to celebrating an occasion, not to others present in society. Happiness and memories do not just build up by having a grand ceremony, it can even lie on small ceremony when celebrated with natural happiness not for show and imitation of others, that should be the way of celebrating with full fledged life time memories.
— Amrita Nepal,
I’m not in favour of the thought that marriage has to be extravagant enough to be remembered by all. It definitely does not have to be extravagant to be remembered. It can be simple yet elegant without being pompous. I think flaunting one’s wealth during marriages is not a very good idea. The money spent in useless expenditure can de-finitely be put to better use.
— Jyotsna Dhakal
If a small and simple wedding is done and instead of spending on a grand ceremony, and the money is given to the couple so that they can spend that money for their requirements like invest for some benefit or save it for their future so that they need not suffer from economic crisis, it would be better. In our society weddings are done extravagantly where parents try very their best to please the other family as well as spend a lot for the party and the entire ceremony. But small and simple marriages help eliminating the dowry system and the problem of torturing daughter-in-laws will also be removed. The great work of Gagan Thapa can be taken as a sou-rce of inspiration for Nepalis youth.
— Krishma Maharjan
Weddings are really grand affairs which happen only once in a lifetime. But that doesn’t mean we should spend a lot of money to make it remembered for the future. No matter how much money you spend on this special occasion but whether it is accepted by others or not. As far as the weddings are concerned, I think it should be simple not extravagant. But it would be better to give the money to the couple as a gift instead. I think that money is sure to help them in many ways such as investing it in the business, adding necessary things and many other things.
— Sudarsan Kandel
There’s no denying the significance of marriage as a once-in-a-lifetime experience, but it doesn’t mean we have to spend a huge and unbelievable amount of money on that. People
often care too much about society. I think, ‘spend in a digestible way’ would be
the right thing to do. Spend as much as you should, not as much as you can. Marriage is not a job and couples aren’t employees that we should give them money. Money creates selfishness, and I personally don’t want people to marry a hundred times, just to get that money.
Marriage can be done in various ways. I prefer it to be done in a simple way so that lakhs of money spent in a party could be utilised either on further education or for a better future.
— Rajana Maharjan
When we cut some part of our expenses say buffet dinner, then it will surely affect income of the ones who are providing us the service. Many workers of the service provider will surely be at a disadvantage. It is not only for this but also for the enthusiasm as this comes only once in our life, so in such a situation I would like to go for investing according to one’s capacity.
— Jim Shrestha,