KATHMANDU:

Bullying in Kathmandu’s schools is a dark and hidden area of social interaction that has thrived on a national culture of impunity and secrecy. While growing up as students in Kathmandu, many of us attended schools where a culture of bullying was present, if not thriving. Bullying is a global phenomenon that imposes severe mental, emotional and physical trauma on its victims. The problem gets worse when a national culture of impunity, such as ours, is dominant.

Bullying is a serious issue, one that schools need to get serious about. Ignoring students who are bullied, ignoring those who have mental heath issues are part of the problem. Schools cannot fix everyone. They shouldn’t have to. However, it is time for schools to step up to the plate and set some firm rules.

For starters, respect must be expected in every school. Any student in a position of leadership, who bullies others should lose their position. Until the favoured ones are punished like everyone else, bullying will continue.

Children who defend themselves are often punished for fighting. Allowing a child to defend him/herself from unprovoked attacks will likely lessen bullying. If you take away a person’s right to self-defence, you leave him/her vulnerable to attack. Bullies know this.

Teachers’ role

Schools also need to teach children what bullying is, and what they want and expect their students to do about it. Students often report that when they try to tell a teacher what has happened, they are told to “stop tattling”. That is not tattling; it is reporting that someone is being or has been hurt. Brushing the student aside makes him/her feel as if no one cares. So, why should they tell?

Parents’ bit

As parents, we seem to slack off when our children become teenagers. They need us as much, if not more, as teens as when they were toddlers. Parents need to step up and find or create something of value for the teens to do. Know where your children are, and who they are with. If they are hanging with the wrong crowd, you need to find alternatives.

Join hands

To prevent bullying in schools, it is necessary to pursue a holistic approach which gets all stakeholders — parents, students, teachers/ school staff — involved. This can be done formally through the formulation of an anti-bullying policy.

In addition to a school policy against bullying, which is vigorously enforced, it is necessary to make interventions at multiple levels to minimise incidents of school bullying. The government should have a clear policy proscribing bullying. Such a government measure will give the necessary backing to schools to model their own anti-bullying policies.

Teachers and school staff should be trained to detect and address incidents of bullying. Additionally, parents should be asked to educate their children on avoiding bullying others and taking action to cope should they be bullied.

While punishment is necessary to deal with perpetrators of bullying, the degree of punishment needs to be appropriate and one should avoid going overboard with them.

Bullying is dangerous and for it to be prevented, ended and/or limited to the extent possible, the role that clear communication, proper training, enhanced awareness and confidence building, can play are critical.

— (Submitted by Abhay Pradhan, Binaya Vaidya, Manoj Basnet, Rashmita Prajapati and

Savidh Basnyet, SAIM)