Lamjung woman carries out last rites of mother-in-law

LAMJUNG: Breaking the gender biased tradition, a woman has performed the last rites of her mother-in-law in Lamjung.

Sobita Kunwar of Archalbot in Dordi Rural Municipality-2 carried out the last rites of her mother-in-law Buddhi Maya Kunwar, who passed away at the age of 70 on Friday, December 29.

Kunwar stepped up to carry out the final rituals of her mother-in-law since the deceased Kunwar's only son had already passed away.

Even today, women in our society are not allowed to touch a dead body. In this context, Sobita said, if women are courageous, they are capable of breaking such traditions that discriminate between the genders.

Traditional beliefs like women should not touch a dead body, or that they cannot go to the site of cremation or burial are now coming to an end with the changing times, according to senior local Ram Prasad Paudel.

According to national network against ill practices, there are 35 ill practices in Nepal inclusive of widow tradition, child marriage, polygamy, kiriyaputri, giving away of daughters in marriage ‘kanyadan’, dowry system, tilak, keeping women away during menstruation, keeping women under veils, Jhuma, triple talaak system, Belbivaha, accusation of witchcraft among others. These ill practices have been the cause of increasing violence against women (VAW).

These malpractices, in the name of culture and tradition, have not just increased violence against women but have also created discrimination between men and women in the society.

Women of the district, who have understood this truth, have come together to change the prevalent malpractices. They have done this not by preaching but by initiating change in their own behaviours.

In the absence of a son, it is pervasive to bring a substitute man ‘kiriyaputri’ to carry out the final rites of a parent. Even if the deceased has a daughter, she is not traditionally allowed to carry out the last rites of her parents like a son.

However, the women in the district have begun to change this practice. Kunwar, who alone carried out the final rites of her mother-in-law, is an example of such brave women.

In recent times, in Lamjung, practices have commenced to allow widows to wear red clothes, to let women and girls live normally during their menstruation among others, according to Women and Children Office (WCO) in the district.

Such initiatives have been strengthened by women themselves in some places, while social organisations and women development offices are involved in other places.

By fracturing malpractices, the VAW can be reduced and gender equality can be maintained, according to Bishnu Maya Paudel, women development officer at the WCO.

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