MIDWAY : A non-committal reply
It may sound a bit absurd at first: this assumption about a reply being non-committal because there is either a simple ‘yes’ or a definite ‘no’. But that is the case with me as far as replying is concerned. It tends to be couched in vague terms so that it confuses rather than clarifies.
Being an introvert my days are spent in loneliness and as I am not keen on socialising rarely do I engage in conversations. When I do perk up my answers are full of circumlocution. This may seem far-fetched but holds true even if I may say so. It is a case of beating around the bush and a failure to come straight to the point. As far as commitment is conce-rned my stock replies are incomplete and in monosyllables. I do not justify this because there is no point in doing so. Given that it constitutes my half-hearted attempt at explaining myself and my forehead creases in a frown. Rather than delving into the heart of the matter, I hesitate, and do not take the plunge. This leaves me floundering and at wit’s end even as I strive to get back on track. But this is not easy for the simple reason that I am already in a quagmire of my own making.
Though this much can be said: I dilly-dally in the hope of making statements that are fit and appropriate to the moment at hand. Whenever I speak everything turns out to be a mess because of the form it takes. And dithering largely explains the state of affairs. Only if I could express myself in a clear, simple and unequivocal manner.
Clarifying a point is not my forte and I would rather not try to commit myself. Because it would turn out to be quite an experience as I can vouchsafe. Neither am I a stickler for raising issues whether they are justified or not and far be it for me to take up the cudgel.
The answer that I do give implies that I am not at all concerned about its effect. Thus nothing happens to which I can lay claims to. And this makes it difficult to come to terms with whatever is confounding me at the moment of speaking. Not being committed has an effect upon what I am saying. This is made clear by the course which the conversation takes after an initial hesitation. Not one to be marked by witticisms, humour and mannerisms. But one that rambles on without any point being made or clarified.