In classic joint patriarchal societies, girls leave almost everything in their natal home, including the support system, when they move into the husband's household where they are subordinate not only to the men but also to senior women, especially mothers-in-law
Men's greater physical strength might have played some role in male dominance in technologically-primitive hunter-gatherer societies, but patriarchy as a natural or god-given phenomenon can't be true. Shulamith Firestone, a Canadian-American radical feminist writer and activist, therefore, defines patriarchy as a system of oppression of women.
The biological inequality between women and men, especially in child rearing, was of great importance for both women and men to provide labour for their tribal society and defend their territory during combat with other tribes when women's average life span was less than 28 years, and infant mortality rate was 70-75 per cent. That proved an evolutionary advantage for early human societies.
For the same reason, women acquiesced to intertribal exchange for marriage, and also became the property of the conquering tribe along with their children.
Physical terror and coercion techniques such as rape were first used to turn free women into slaves.
Class/race domination was possible after mastering it, which must have slowly, but eventually, became manifest in almost all aspects of society – social, political, legal, religion, economic and many more.
The stronger male-male alliances during the hunter-gatherer period, and male control over resources during food-sharing interacted in a positive feedback loop over the course of human evolution. Similarly, masculine traits have long been associated with positions of power as is evident by an example where former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher trained herself to speak with a deeper voice to sound more authoritative.
The example of under-reported cases of rape and sexual assaults, and dismal number of convictions out of the reported cases, elucidates the patriarchal structure supported by props at different levels.
Unfortunately, even with technological advances in tools and contraceptives for women to take control over their reproductive cycle that is muting gender differences, women are still struggling to liberate themselves from deep-rooted male domination.
From birth, sex is identi-fied, and through childhood, the roles are defined having distinct behaviours and attributes that are considered appropriate to the female and male identity.
One evident trend in America that others around the world are emulating is "Pink is for girls and blue is for boys". Pink is closer to red, a romantic colour, representing girls as being more emotional than boys- a role that they are supposed to grow and fit into, questioning the sexual orientation or gender identity of the LGBTQIA+.
Stephanie Lynn Budin, a historian who focuses on gender, religion, sexuality and iconography in ancient Greece and the Near East, elucidated how patriarchy redefined free women, such as the Mesopotamian harimtu, the ancient Greekhetaira, the Renaissance Italian cortigiana, the Japanese geisha, and the Indian Devadasi, as prostitutes, and eventually forced them into prostitution.
The strong influence of patriarchy supported by British colonial rule abolished matrilineal society in the Indian state of Kerala, who interpreted women's sexual freedom as promiscuity, and property owner-ship through the female line as dispossession of males.
In classic joint patriarchal societies, girls leave almost everything in their natal home, including the support system, when they move into the husband's household where they are subordinate not only to the men but also to senior women, especially mothers-in-law.
Mothers-in-laws are unfortunately found to be the active agents for subordination with their ingrained expectation of servility in their daughters-in-law, including their daughters escalating and perpetuating violence against women.
The girls, therefore, usually struggle to build a new relationship in this unfamiliar and often hostile space.
Even in the nuclear family, the external intervention of in-laws has found to sour the budding relationships among couples, leading to divorces.
In the context of Nepal, patriarchy is so ingrained in the mind-set of the people that it is normal for women to be unfairly treated, harassed, abused and raped. In the official documents, the father's name bears more significance.
There was a case of a divorced woman who wanted to process her citizenship.
Her son already had citizenship, but that couldn't be presented as an evidence document to process her citizenship because they wanted her ex-husband to come to the Chief District Officer's office.
The husband was of course bluntly refusing it.
The citizenship card was finally processed after a candid conversation with the officer after visiting the CDO office.
There was another case where the drunk husband was beating his wife and their children were crying in fear. A crowd was watching it as they considered it to be an internal matter and didn't want to intervene.
"It is normal for the husband to beat his wife," they said. When I stepped in, he confronted me and asked me to get married to his wife as he is going to leave her. Others just remained silent.
Patriarchy threatens the very existence of life on earth. A feminist worldview will enable everyone to free their minds from patriarchal thought and practice, and at last build a better world free of dominance and hierarchy. More awareness for women obedient to patriarchy is required to make them rethink as patriarchy, the human created historic construct, though not an evil conspiracy of men, is no longer functional in this age.
Gajurel works as a senior computational scientist and an adjunct assistant professor at Case Western Reserve University
A version of this article appears in the print on January 25, 2023, of The Himalayan Times.
