Hong Kong, October 7:

Some irritating little habits can be fatally annoying and can eventually drive partners to distraction and make a relationship crumble and crack. It might be the way he leaves the cap off the tube of toothpaste. It might be the way she takes too much luggage on holiday. It might be the way he addresses her in babyish terms in public. It might be the way she fidgets with her hair.

Scientists have researched just how damaging these little habits can be in some relationships, saying if left unchecked and repeated constantly they can cause a reaction similar to a physical allergy in the partner on the receiving end. In a study published by the US journal Personal Relationship, researchers claimed the emotional response triggered by those annoying habits increases in intensity the more and more they are repeated.

The study found that couples who reported higher numbers of bad habits among their partners were less likely to stay together. According to Michael Cunningham, one of the psychology professors who led the research, the so-called “social allergies” or behaviour that stirs negative emotions are like a pebble in your shoe or poison ivy. “The first experience with a physical allergen, such as poison ivy, is likely to produce a small negative reaction, but with repeated contact the sensitivity tends to increase and the negative reaction becomes stronger,” he said. “The same repetition sensitivity response appears to occur in emotional reactions following a partner’s unpleasant behaviour.” Cunningham says the increased insensitivity occurs because the annoyance at the act is added to the annoyance of its repetition, the memory of past, similar behaviour. “The closeness and familiarity of a romantic relationship can create a range of emotions from contentment to contempt,” says the report.

“Learning about the partner’s hopes and dreams, and exchanging support, kindness and affection, can lead to love and commitment. But the process of going backstage and learning everything there is to know about the other person’s private self can also lead to some undesirable surprises.” The study questioned 137 dating couples about their partners’ behaviour, the frequency of certain bad habits and the emotional response they triggered.