KATHMANDU, MAY 30

A crude sense of wisdom dawned before I embarked on a journey in the far western laps of the hills of Dang as a secondary level teacher.

As a cohort of a group of volunteer teachers on a shared mission to end educational injustice in the nation, we underwent numerous sessions on tackling systemic injustices, casteism, differentiation in class and socio-economic aspects as to why over two-thirds of the students enrolled in grade one drop out of school by the time they reach grade 12.

I reminisce my Lamjung visit during the learning period, a 42-day residential training camp before being selected for the fellowship. From what I learnt, Nepal appeared to be richer than what I could have ever imagined. It only took me one pep talk with my host family in Lamjung that unfolded ways to tap the insights of what I had been missing all these years.

Bibek's father, bread earner of the family, shared something about family and parenting. He shared how he would have given up everything just to share a meal with his family during his time abroad.

He was convinced that in our country poor lives could only be lifted through remittances, but it was this oxymoron of something less exotic about parenting that changed my perception.

Most of us are aware of parenting in Western countries.

When a child comes of age, they need to leave the nest to seek a befitting career path and earn a livelihood on their own. This definitely makes children independent, an individualistic approach of sorts.

However, when the ageing parents are left all alone without their children around, it leads to melancholy and loneliness in the long run. But thanks to our Eastern values, it's still common to see Nepali parents living with their grown-up children throughout their life, supporting them all along.

So isn't the idea of becoming a parent to your ageing parents beautiful? How often do we get to see a mature son or daughter living with their parents in the Western world? Not many. It might even be frowned upon.

Yes, we all want to live a sophisticated life and drive the wagon of extreme liberty. We're greatly inspired by the Western means of development.

However, it must be well comprehended that Westernisation and modernisation are two distinct terms.

Being guided by a Western lifestyle isn't necessarily the pathway to development. We must take pride in our Eastern parenting philosophy to say the least. As a nation we might even get better with foreign employment and have a lavish lifestyle while choosing to follow our foreign ambitions.

But in the process let's not sabotage the beautiful age-old parenting tradition, currently on the brink of collapse.

A version of this article appears in the print on May 31, 2022, of The Himalayan Times.