The world today has become highly competitive. Not only have the demands of people mounted but the prices of things have also rocketed. With limited income, a family cannot compete and fulfil their demands. So most of the parents do jobs to generate income and lighten the burden of the family. All parents know that leaving their babies on other people’s responsibility is not a right decision but they have no other options. If they leave their jobs for their babies, they might not get another job easily. To protect their jobs, parents hire someone to look after their babies. Only a few parents are lucky enough to get good caretakers for their babies. Most of caretakers work for money and they do not care for the babies well. They neither nurse them in time nor look after them well. Many incidents have been recorded of such carelessness of caretakers and it is a fact that many babies have fallen prey to their ruthlessness and died untimely deaths. Childhood is the stage when babies learn about their parents and the society. If babies do not get proper love, affection and care in their childhood, they’ll be aggressive and won’t listen to their parents. They will become the black sheep of the family and hence a burden to the country. This is when the parents finally realise and blame themselves. All their hard work and earnings become useless. So the present situation is a Hobson’s choice for parents. Without a job it is difficult to survive and to have a job, they might have to sacrifice their children’s future.

Birendra Shrestha “Deepankara”, Kirtipur

A parent should not be ineffective at communicating important lessons to a child, as the parent is the child’s first teacher. Babysitters may not be able to give the same love and care to the children as parents do. Giving one’s children ample time and attention is very important and as once they are taught things the right way, they will never fall into wrong hands or habits. Certain attitudes, skills, and behaviours such as the ability to read and the habit of considering other persons’ needs and feelings as well as one’s own, may be “programmed” into a child in his/ her childhood. Skills such as walking, reading etc can be taught by anyone. But what about their needs and feelings? Only parents can know and understand their children’s needs and feelings. It’s a job of a babysitter to take care of the children and they are paid for it. But for parents, it is their sole responsibility. Every parent should give ample time to their child in their childhood.

Purna Bajra Bajracharya

In my opinion, every child should be given proper care during his childhood, because that period is what basically shapes up his life or career. In the developed countries, we find that mostly working parents cannot give much time to their babies. But I don’t think it is such a huge problem as it entirely depends on their attitude as to how they handle the situation. Finally, I’d like to say that the time has come for the Nepali parents as well. They should bring up their children independently from their very childhood so that they can exist and turn their lifestyles as per the requirements of the present world.

Deepesh Shrestha, Sydney

In the earlier times, very few women were engaged in jobs. Time changed, as it is inevitable. Most of the women these days are busy not only for the sake of their kids, but also due to the other responsibilities they have to fulfil in their households. It has indeed become a trend for most of the mothers, who are busy working all day long, leaving their children in crèches. However it is their compulsion because they either don’t have domestic helps or don’t have time to be with their kids. There are many pros and cons behind leaving ones children in a crèche. I don’t think children would benefit in such conditions instead of being with their families in such a small age. But the age of the child to be put in a crèche should be standardised, as the number of crèches in town is mushrooming each day. If the owners of the crèches keep aside their profit-making motives and pay more attention on providing quality services, then it would benefit both the parents and the children. The caretakers should care for the children as their own.

Arjun Prasad Tiwari

There is a saying ‘Nothing can be superior over the beliefs’. Of course parents have to face problems with small kids while they are working. Leaving children in crèches is not itself bad, while their parents work or pursue any other activities. For this, the caretakers should be very reliable and honest and should do what they are instructed to. Others can also take good care of children if they will be able to provide fair love to them. If the babysitter tries to cheat the parents and does not provide proper care to the children, there would be great difficulty for parents and children too will face psychological problems. So in summarised words, leaving kids in a crèche would have a lot of merits if the kids are not miss-guided and properly cared for.

Nabin Kandel

Where there is a will, there is a way. Science and technology have made everything possible in the present world. Bearing babies in the womb for nine months and then nursing them at home has become a hindrance for working women in the capital and hence they are heading towards crèches and other day-care centres, which provide good nursing and a good environment for babies. This practice has just recently started in our country and parents are still in a dilemma regarding such facilities. Though every parent aspires to give extra love and care their babies themselves, they are compelled to leave them in crèches because of their careers. Hence, it has become the best alternative for many parents these days.

Arjun Prasad Bhandari, Chitwan

Nowadays in families where both the parents are working, time is often short in supply. But every child needs regular private time with its parents, time that doesn’t have to be shared with anyone else. Most working parents leave their children in crèches nowadays. It is true that they do not get the required care and attention in such crèches, but there is no other option besides that.

Ashok Banjade, Koteshwor

If a child lives with finding faults in others, he learns to blame others. If a child lives a morally strict life, he learns to fight for the right. If a child lives with disgrace, he learns to feel like a criminal. If a child lives with encouragement, he learns to respect others. No matter whether the child is brought up be it in a crèche or at home, the most important factor is the environment. Every parent should realize that life is not only about making money and acquiring power and recognition. Work is only necessary to keep us living so that one can enjoy the pleasures of life. Parents must strike a balance between work and family. I see nothing wrong in keeping babies in crèches so far. But, if you take care of your children personally, you will be able to tend to their needs and be in touch with their emotional and physical milestones. You can also import important values and encourage them to do the right things at the right time. It has been universally acknowledged that parents are the best people to care for their children.

Rup Bahadur Sunar, Baliya-9, Kailali

Definitely, babies need extra care. But on the contrary parents, nowadays, are resorting to the idea of crèches because of limited off-hours. This plight of working parents may result into incomplete emotional and psychological development of their babies, which on the other hand will create grave concerns later. It is not that the parents enjoy work more than their babies but they too are helpless because they must work to meet the requirements of their babies. But still there’s a point they have to think about. Is it their maximum indulgence with their babies’ upbringing or is it their money that’s going to help more in their development? Can’t a father working harder and mother staying at home with kids, for just a few years, until they grow big enough to go to school, manage it?

Rajesh Giri

Certainly, in the urban areas women are not entirely confined to the four walls of their houses. The ongoing changes in lifestyle have many positive and negative consequences. Mothers are not being able to give as much time as they could earlier. After few weeks of their delivery, they have to join their office and since, most of the families in cities like Kathmandu are nuclear, the infants are handed over to childcare centres. Although it’s not good, it depends on the condition or situation because many families won’t be able to survive unless the mother goes out and earns some money.

Eak Prasad Duwadi

Many children are deprived of adequate care, as working parents cannot manage to look after their children during their working hours. In the capital, keeping their children in a crèche is an alternative but still the question whether children get enough care in other people’s hands arises. Probably the answer is negative. It is not only difficult but also impossible to pay individual attention to each and every child in day nurseries. Besides the care they provide cannot be the same as that of a mother. There is a vast difference between the care given by others and that given by the parents themselves. After all blood is thicker than water. This trend of leaving children in other people’s responsibility not only hampers a child’s adequate upbringing but also weakens the maternal bond to some extent. However, though there are many disadvantages in following such a practice, there is no other alternative for nuclear families. This is the reason why this trend is so popular and successful in the western countries.

Sudarshan Pant, Kirtipur

Working parents do face problems while trying to maintain a balance between their personal and family life even under normal circumstances. This problem is felt even more when their children are small. Leaving children in crèches has been the usual practice of most of the working parents in order to solve the problem. I do believe that babies need extra care but in my opinion, there are two views. When I observe from the working parent’s perspective, this is fair enough as they will enrol the baby in quality crèches as far as they can. This means proper care. Sometimes even better than at home! Enrolled in crèches, the children will be able to grow and also learn in an innovative manner. But this definitely depends on the quality of the crèche. However, on the other side, when I perceive from the child’s side, yes it is true that the child has a right to get good nurturing from the parents especially at this stage of her/his life. But, the parent has also tried her/his best to enrol her child in the best crèche. In addition to this, when I again reflect back to the parent’s career, which might be the peak time for her/his professional life, then isn’t it justifiable for the parent to built her career for the bright future of her/his child, which again justifies the fact that, the parent is thinking for his/her child’s future?

Renuka Gurung, Programme Officer, MS Nepal (Danish Association for International Cooperation), Gyaneshwor, Kathmandu

Working mothers leaving small babies in crèches is very common in the developed countries these days because the crèches are well equipped and all the attendants are well trained to take care of babies. In Nepal if the crèches have well trained attendants, I feel it will be safer and better to keep the babies with the crèche instead of leaving them at home at the mercy of family members or servants in the house. Because maidservants or our old parents cannot spare all their time as they will be busy with something or the other. One maidservant cannot pay full attention to the baby having to do other household chores. Even if our parents love their grand children, they will have their own things to do and cannot give full time to the baby and anything could happen to the baby. It will be more hygienic with timely food given under the proper care of well-trained personnel. I advise mothers should make sure that the crèche they are leaving their baby is well equipped with well trained attendants, otherwise it is not advisable to leave your baby in such crèches that do not have trained attendants. In that case — sacrifice your job — be with your baby because the baby will be your walking stick in your old age.

Deki Yangzom, Thimphu, Bhutan

Leaving newborn babies in crèches and other day-care centres by working parents has become a matter of serious concern these days especially if the parents are very career-oriented. It is not a bad idea to leave kids in other people’s hands. This practice is very common in the western societies. Further, it has been proved that children need to be on their own for their psychological development. The caretaker has to be good and should know how to handle children in a proper manner otherwise it might harm the child’s mental and physical growth.

Basanta Jung Rayamajhi, Shankar Dev campus

Most parents, especially, in the urban areas, are engaged in work these days. And if they have small kids, they cannot go out for work leaving them alone at home. Definitely, it creates a great problem. I don’t think leaving children in crèches is unsafe. This is one of the best options for working parents. Crèches give children an opportunity where they get a different environment and can acquire knowledge, which will, help them grow and think on their own. Of course, they cannot get the same love and care as their parents but it’s better being there rather than being lonely at home. The crucial point is that the parents must be careful while choosing the child care centres and, on the other hand, the caretakers must be sincere so that the kids are loved and cared for in the same way as their parents would.

Rajendra Lama, Milan Chowk, Cha. Pur-1, Rautahat

All round development of a child depends upon his own parents. The others will not love and take care of any child as his own parents would. Parents will always pray for the best for their child. A child will not get proper care and love in a stranger’s hands. However, in today’s times, when both husband and wife are busy building their careers, they cannot give all their time to their child. For them, something is better than nothing. As they have to attend their office, they are forced to leave their child in a crèche. But if they are compelled to do so, they should carefully select the crèche. This is only alternative they have to raise their child in a proper manner.

Mohan Narshingh Shrestha, Kupondole

The progress of a nation is judged by the way we treat our children. Babies are like raw mud; parents are the porters, the builders of their destiny. So parents are the first responsible persons in the development of the baby in the earlier stages. A small mistake in their childhood can cost them their entire career. Babies need extra care and attention by their parents for a better and secure future. Giving birth to babies is easy but bringing them up in a good way is difficult for the parents. When babies are born, they cry until their mothers pick them up in their arms. A baby can easily distinguish his mom’s arms and love. The difference is quite obvious when we observe one baby brought up in a crèche and the other at home. Hence, it is not fair to leave them in crèches. If we observe the babies in crèches, we see that they are not happy there. They seem sad and miss their own mothers though they have been provided with every facility in the centres. It is better for mothers to quit their jobs until the babies reach a particular age.

Krishan Bhandari

Of course, parents should give proper care and time to their children for they deserve it. But it does not mean that parents should stick to their children all the time. In case of cities, where the acceleration of life is so great that most of the parents work and they are compelled to leave their children in crèches or in the hands of caretakers. We can’t deny that children need extra care but leaving them in other peoples hands does not mean that they are being devoid of proper care. For this, parents should be careful while choosing the crèches or caretakers. Parents should give their free time and regular attention to that children do not feel isolated from their parent’s love and care. We have seen many examples of children getting involved in drugs and many other illegal activities due to improper love and care by the parents. So if we think that leaving children in others’ hand is not fair, then one of the parents should give up his/her career for sometime which might cost them the labours of his/her whole life.

Dilip Dachhepati, Pulchowk Campus

There is no solution better than to keep the children with their parents. Babies not only need special care but also need a healthy environment & good suggestions that only parents can give. The suggestions that parents will give today, will be rooted in their minds forever, will shape their adult life would pass it on to their children. I oppose parents leaving their children in other people’s hands since they might require advice and suggestions at any moment in their lives. Obviously children are like the potter’s mud; they take the shapes in their lives through the knowledge they get from the environment. Recently child welfare specialist did a survey on those children who were kept in the crèches, day care centres, and foster care centres. The consequences are dire, as the children possess pseudo mental retardation, learning disabilities, mental illness, criminality, sexual perversions and anger. That’s why to keep children in crèches is not a fair decision. Due to the lack of better alternatives, childcare centres are mushrooming in the cities day by day. This is the time for the parents to be conscious about their child’s future. If they are willing to be responsible parents, they can seek a personal guardian or one of the parents should be ready to leave his/her job to keep their child under their own supervision until the baby grows up.

Bimal Ojha (Shasakta), Dhangadhi, Kailali