Kathmandu:

I don’t know what but I guess something was wrong with me. I was so much concerned about him. I just knew that it was love. I was cowardly trying to make hold of him as if I would die without him. I knew he loves me, too, but I was too concerned about him. I wanted him to be with me all the while although I knew that it is not possible. I was so blind in his love and did everything to get his love. Slowly days passed by and I started to get the feeling that he did not want to be with me. May be he felt uneasy with my behaviour. I was too possessive about him and cared for him more than myself. May be being over conscious for him was my mistake. I never ever realised that he wants his freedom from me. The relation that begun two years ago with a warm smile and healing words seemed to vanish in the air in two seconds. He broke our relationship for no possible reason. The last time when he came to meet me, he said that he did not want to be with me and walked off leaving me alone. I stood there all alone with eyes full of tears and could not do anything .I was left alone to wipe my tears. For a month, I felt like I have lost everything, my determination, aspiration and my inspiration.

I was profoundly hurt and will always rue upon for the tragedy. I often threw myself in a corner and cried for nothing. But slowly time healed my pain and taught me lots of thing. I became vigorous than before. I started figuring out my duties, my aim and worked hard for it. I kept myself busy and tried hard not to let his memory disturb me. But, whenever it deluges I still feel his absence and miss him a lot. Even today whenever I delve into my heart, I can still find love for him knowing that he has abandoned our relationship. Today, I am a successful woman of 24 and know very well how to handle the relationships with friends and with the loved ones. I just want to make clear to dear readers that relationships of all kinds are like sand held in the hand. Held loosely with an open hand, the sand remains where it is. The minute you close your hand and squeeze tightly to hold on, the sand trickles through your fingers. You may hold onto some of it but most will be spilled. A relation is like that, held loosely with respect and freedom for the other person; it is likely to remain intact. But hold too tightly, too possessively and the relationship slips away and is lost forever.