There is a vast majority of women who still have not had the opportunity yet to raise their voice and fulfill their agency as a human being with dignity, aspirations and dreams. Many women of this group have actually given up on any meaningful change in their lives
Last Tuesday, we commemorated International Women's Day, a day that, ideally, should not be even celebrated. I am saying so not because we should not care about women and their achievements but because in a still, unfortunately utopist vision in my mind, women would have already achieved full equality and empowerment.
As a consequence, in that scenario, because there is no need of an International Men's Day, therefore, we would not feel obliged to celebrate women because their achievements would be what we call a "fait accompli".
Yet, as we know, we are still not there though a country like Nepal has made giant steps ahead in terms of gender equity.
This is a contest that is part of the broader goal of realising social justice on the ground, a difficult process focussed on creating the right conditions for women to uplift themselves, emerge and thrive.
If, at the same time, it is encouraging to read stories about more and more women venturing into the creation of new startups, yet it is equally frustrating to see how many unfair and discriminatory state policies are still bogging them down.
Activism is focussed on ensuring that this unjust framework of rules, regulations, policies and laws is reversed and changed while entrepreneurship is geared towards creating change through development activities that create wealth.
This vast network of women activists and this increasing number of budding entrepreneurs are slowly making the difference.
Step by step the table against gender discrimination is being turned.
But it is also true that there is a vast majority of women who still have not had the opportunity yet to raise their voice and fulfill their agency as a human being with dignity, aspirations and dreams.
Many women of this group have actually given up on any meaningful change in their lives, and it is happening because there is still a vast majority of men who, consciously or unconsciously, are putting barriers in the path of women's self-emancipation.
In this context what should be really celebrated and what should be the next steps to really turn the tide and achieve gender equality? As the British Ambassador to Nepal, Nicola Pollitt, clearly said on the occasion of this celebration, "It's not up to women and girls alone to champion their own rights. Men and boys should play their part, too".
So, perhaps, we men should really start reckoning with this truth, that each of us has a responsibility to do something more to ensure that there is a level playing field "out there", and dreams and aspirations of our wives, partners and female friends can be achieved.
In one year's time, we will once again be here celebrating International Women's Day, and I am wondering if again we will repeat the same things, using the same lofty rhetoric used for these special occasions, but then, as it ultimately happens, we would just move on with indifference.
Perhaps, instead, men could really get serious about gender equity and gender equality and start doing something.
My proposal is the following: let's create group competitions in which men step up and turn up their sleeves in doing something more for the women close to them.
Those making the best efforts to facilitate, ease the life of their mothers, partners and friends would receive some sort of symbolic award handed over by their own dear ones – women.
We could even do this in an office environment.
Imagine, for example, a group of five male colleagues coming together to make a pledge to personally do more to make gender equality a reality not in an abstract future but in their own lives. Each would commit to do something in this regard.
It could be spending more time with the children while the wife can do something on her own.
It could be about helping out more with the house chores, for example cleaning the dishes and washing cloths or it could be about providing moral and technical support to help their dear women of their lives to achieve their goals.
Each group would be monitored and assessed by a number, say 3 to 4, of female peers in the same office that would act as judges and advisors at the same time.
There would be periodic review meetings in which the male contestants would provide updates on their efforts because, yes, we are talking about efforts that slowly must become "normalised" and embedded in a male's way of living.
We could have hundreds of such teams whose members would "compete" to do practical and tangible things about gender equality.
On the occasion of the next International Women's Day, the verdicts on the actions made, and the changes occurred as a consequence, would be out in special celebratory gatherings.
This might seem like a silly idea and surely I do not want to trivialise a huge problem that still causes so much pain and suffering.
However, we need to find new ways to change the status quo and create some sort of accountability mechanisms through a fun way that can appeal to the youth and seniors as well so as to make a tiny difference in soceity as a whole.
Achieving and mainstreaming equality is ultimately about behaviour change.
Some small nudges from our female colleagues might do wonders to help our mothers, spouses and female friends reach the day in which they would finally say: "enough with this celebration, we are too busy changing the world, but if you need our help, we are always ready to do so in whatsoever manner".
Galimberti is the co-founder of ENGAGE, an NGO partnering with youths living with disabilities
A version of this article appears in the print on March 11, 2022, of The Himalayan Times
