Life loomed large as I stared at the empty canvas. I had long thought about capturing the wonders of life in my painting, but had little idea that it could be this hard. An hour passed and still I couldn’t come up with anything. As I delved deeper, it dawned on me that I was yet to understand myself: the reason for my very existence.

We are born to toil through life and die, just like that — no, not enough to placate my turbulent mind. I found myself at a loss and unable to come up with any colour to complete the painting.

Philosophy, I realised, is not just the sacred attic of the likes of Socrates and Confucius. As long as we can think and reason, each of us will be faced with questions that need answering. My consciousness was kindled and there would be no respite till I could come up with something substantial to justify the existence of mankind itself.

I ransacked the book cabinet at home, consulted libraries and covered umpteen volumes on philosophy. I pounced on any scientific article dealing with time and the universe. I remained glued to television hearing the preachers talk about heaven and hell, soul and salvation, etc.

My normal life was going haywire but still the fire inside my heart would not be doused.

I read about matter and anti-matter, a universe that came into being from an absolute void, which had no beginning and no end. Nothing seemed to fit the broader picture and every alley I took turned out to be a cul-de-sac.

But as I went deeper, I realised that the eternal quest for the truth itself gives fuel to our existence.

Rather than settle for unpalatable ideas, we probe further into the depths of the universe and within ourselves. All the achievements so far are intermediate —junctions in the road leading up to knowing the self.

Every bit we contribute helps the greater cause of mankind. Each of us can put in our bit in this great quest that has been continuing since time immemorial.

I gained a second wind as I realised that my search for identity was best served in continuing to do what I knew the best. I felt light at heart.

Finally, I had all the colours I needed to complete the painting.