Perhaps Shakespeare set the precedence when he sent Romeo and Juliet to the gallows for their adolescent ardour. Since, hundreds of movies have been rehashed and countless novels penned after the Bard’s timeless classic. All in the name of love — both true and not quite. To make the difference clear, Shakespeare throws Rosaline into the thick of things. Romeo, for all intents and purposes, is head over ears in love with the bonny Rosaline. And then... he crosses the path of the ethereal daughter of the Capulets at a banquet. On seeing Juliet for the first time, muses the Cupid-cajoled Romeo: “Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight! / For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night”.

Fickle, one might say. But how often do we hear about people struggling to find the right one? The moot question rather is: Who or what decides? Scientists have been able to pin-point the seats of our primal emotions like love, fear, hope and desire in various regions of the brain. Amazingly, manual electric activation of the part of the brain responsible for that heartwarming affection of love gives rise to an identical feeling in lab conditions.

But the argument also works the other way round. Positive emotions like love, empathy and generosity enhance the production of the feel-good hormones and help remove toxic body chemicals. This, in turn, has a conducive effect on the brain and its wirings. Or, it is our conscious decisions that largely determine our wellbeing in the end.

Those who report loving true, on average, live much longer and keep the people around them happier through the positive vibes they generate as compared to those who have a conscious knowledge of deceiving their loved ones, and knowing or unknowingly, cheating themselves. The latter are not only doing their mind and body a big disservice, the negative vibes their stress-filled psyche send out have a deleterious effect on those close by as well.

Try to be true to yourself and your companion this one day. For reciprocal emotions not forthcoming might not be as important as the invaluable chance for that long-deferred heart-to-heart. A touch maudlin you might sound. A wee bit cushy. What the heck. It’s Valentine’s Day.