MIDWAY : Promises to keep

Exam time was over and like everyone else I was making the most of every second by doing all sorts of things I loved.

The list ranged from watching television, listening to music, hanging around with my friends, eating my favourite food, to just imagining all kinds of things I would have done had I the good fortune. But while I pretended to be happy outside, a sense of foreboding had clouded over me. I was enjoying all kinds of fun-filled activities that I had left my exams far behind. Yet, I stopped to ponder, did I deserve such rewards?

First of all, I had hardly prepared. In fact, when I come to think about it now, my pre-exam routine was not that different from the one immediately following it. It consisted of having loads of fun and killing time in little nothings.

It was only when the 11th hour blues struck that I clutched my book with sweaty palms.

In the end, it proved to be a Sisyphean struggle, which I was never destined to win. After an entire year of entertainment, leisure and loafing around, a single day of struggle could hardly be expected to pay me rich rewards... unless, of course, I was lucky enough to discover serendipity at every wrong turn I made.

Turns out, I am not that lucky. Very few are. Luck, I discovered, does not come cheap. As a testament, I recall the question paper scaring the living daylights out of me. That day, I had returned home filled with gloom and apprehension, repenting every bit of time I had wasted.

However, never the one to give up, an optimist had whispered from within: “Every day is the first day of the rest of your life.” This heartens me and gives me the strength to fight on. I realised that a single failure was not the end of the world. That, in turn, motivated me to learn from my past mistakes, and work hard today in order to secure a better future.

My resolution this academic year is not to give in to sloth. No, this is not like any other New Year resolution. First, this is not a new year. Second, I have never been more determined to see my plan through. I know it is tough to live up to one’s expectations and start veering from your normal path. But try I will. With everything I have.