Prerana Marasini:

My one-year-old niece cries when she doesn’t get what she wants. She cries for chocolates, for failing to pull of the cap from the pen and for failing to unhook the batteries from the radio set. But she’s too young to know what it means to cry or what her wet eyes mean. As for me, her tears burn my heart and the desire comes to do anything to please her — she unknowingly overpowers me. Clever as she is, she’s understood my weakness.

On this aspect, I was almost like my daughter till conscience overpowered me one day, that tears also mean a way to gain sympathy. Upon mulling over the same, I considered tears as a powerful weapon to persuade, convince, cheat, or even deceive people. Some shed crocodile tears while others are too weak to conceal their emotions.

In my case, whenever I was hurt, I would shut the door of my room, fasten the latch and sob out my difficulties. Not many people in this world have seen me crying. I would feel ashamed if anyone caught me doing so. In my room hung a mirror in which I’d look at myself while weeping. I still remember the tear-smirched face of mine in the mirror that day. The welling eyes had made me miserable and the wet face told me I was looking pitiful.

Out of nowhere, questions began flooding my mind. Why am I crying? Why am I weak? Then I had the urge to wipe off my tears and so I did. I painted a smile on my face and felt good as I looked better. From then on, I tried to hold back tears even when I was on the verge of breaking down.

Women are vulnerable; people say so for apparent reasons. Agreed, women are by nature not as physically strong as men. Nor can every women punch their way to the ring as Laila Ali! And our tears come down very easily. Though we belong to the league of the mentally tough ones, our eyes get filled more often than not. And it is our tears that make people conceive us as weak. Some say it’s good to cry your heart out. But my experience says that sobbing doesn’t light one’s heart but drowns it in sorry, even if it is perceived sorrow. Tears stand as the first obstacle in overcoming other hurdles.

Bob Marley, I believe, sang No Woman, No Cry to pass on a message to women who shed tears unnecessarily at times when they need to be rational and unemotional. Even though doctors say it’s good for health to shed tears, I think it only makes one weak. To be able to face anything, all one needs is strength which might be obscured by his or her own tears.