KATHMANDU, JUNE 6

"When I was younger, I was deprived of love and compassion," Numa Limbu (Chanchala), 34, a transgender woman, told the Himalayan Times that she now reciprocates compassion and love with others.

The fire of the movement burning within Numa Limbu 'Chanchala' has now turned into hope in the eyes of hundreds. She is more than just a character; she represents an idea, a rebellion, and a living history. Embracing the pain, humiliation, and self-doubt that come with being transgender, she has dedicated her life to helping others like herself.

Numa was born in a thatched hut in Babiya Birta (now Rangeli Municipality), Morang. During her childhood, when she needed the love and care the most, the hands of love were severed from her shoulders-first by her parents' deaths, then by societal oppression. "I lost both my parents in the span of a month when I was 12 years old, and I was also losing myself," she says.

She was a bright student at school. However, there was a difference in her gestures, speech, attire, and expression. The difference was natural, but society viewed it as a 'flaw' and began to despise her.

Friends would laugh and say 'hijra' or 'chakka.' Teachers would scold me, saying, 'Aren't you ashamed to be a third gender?' and 'These are the ones who ruin society, despite being in place of educators.' When she was kicked by the police in a public place, she pondered the question, "Is my existence a crime?"

Meanwhile, her war with her own body had yet to begin. As a teenager, she waged an odd war with her body. She hated looking in the mirror. She would sometimes laugh and fantasise about killing herself. "I was neither a man nor a woman as society wanted me to be-I was simply myself," she says.

Her life would have ended in despair if she hadn't met sexual and gender minorities like herself at an NGO programme in Biratnagar. That's where it all started-a journey of self-acceptance of identity, a redefinition of life, and a mission to shine a light on others like her.

Numa says, "I am also a human being, and I want and need love. However, that love was one of trust and respect-but in the eyes of the law, it was a crime."

She went to the ward office with her partner to register for marriage. The employees laughed, saying, "What marriage? "Is this a game for you?"

Numa didn't keep quiet that day. She responded, "This is my life, not a game." From that point forward, she made a private love affair public.

The issue continues to persist today. No legislation has been passed. That is why Numa worked tirelessly to achieve it. When she demanded citizenship with the identity of 'woman,' the administrator responded by asking, "What proof do you have that you are?" Nonetheless, she had become restless in her dreams.

"On paper, I was both a man and a woman. I was always restless inside," she admits.

The constitution of Nepal guarantees the rights of gender and sexual minorities. In practice, however, citizens like Numa continue to lack access to government services, legal protection, and social acceptance.

"The language of the constitution is good," she says, adding, "but the grammar of practice remains rooted in discrimination."

She is fighting for marriage registration, citizenship based on identity, transgender-friendly policies, access to public services, and legal recognition.

Numa has spent nearly two decades as a programme coordinator in Damak, Jhapa, coordinating with more than 15 local levels in Koshi Province to conduct sex education, capacity-building training, and policy-making programmes. She is now based in Kathmandu.

She has also pushed for budgets for safe housing for community members. She is not limited to the province; she has been visiting Kathmandu and explaining sexual minorities' rights to officials inside Singha Durbar (government executive secretariat). "I am one, but I have the voice of thousands," she states.

Her definition of family extends beyond blood ties. "Family is companionship and acceptance, and love is inseparable.

Her partner and the friends she shares with her are her family, and intimacy provides more support than the legal seal."

She now trains police officers, argues with judges, and participates in the legislative process. She represents a new definition of trust, justice, and liberty.

Numa Limbu (Chanchala) is more than just a name; she is the name of a movement.

She has redefined not only the term "transgender woman" but also terms like 'love,' 'citizenship,' and 'human rights.'

"Identity is not something to conceal; it is something to display," she says. "Yet I walk around spreading love and hope. Because when love is shared, hatred vanishes."