Emotions, when well expressed, not only bring relief, they also express empathy. Empathy is as powerful as any healing 'tool' - the more it is used, the better is one's intelligence, emotional and spiritual quotient
We sense, we sight, we smell, we touch, we hear, we taste, and so on - and, yet, we don't always bestow our mind's eye, or 'I,' for such subtleties. This credo holds good for our feelings, or emotions - our fundamental constituent that makes us what we are. The paradox also is we are not always in sync with our natural emotions as we are with our basic senses. To pick a prominent example, the flavour, or taste, of food, for the most part, is subject to endless discussion. Not so much our emotions. Nobody engages in a long, verbal exposition of someone's emotions, as much as their attitude, or idiosyncrasies. The end result is obvious - we are more than inclined to wedge, or cram, our natural emotions. This, in turn, leads to a sense of denial, or suppression, of our own feelings.
You'd have, perhaps, guessed it right - that it is only when we accommodate our feelings and express them that we tend to climb to the next level, if not the highest level. This also bids fair to our greatest moments of emotional release - not the mere purging of accumulated, unwanted, or unpleasant emotions that reside deep within. This isn't rocket science - it is the simplest of the sciences and also arts. It calls for the seamless acceptance, or understanding, of what we are feeling, at a given point, or when someone we love, or know, is feeling low, or disheartened. The best part is - such a simple embodiment of empathy often leads to a harmonious state of balance, primarily because we did not take sides with oneself, or others - but, played a useful part in easing someone's distress, more or less, effortlessly. This was no miracle, or magic. It ushered in palpable, tangible relief for someone 'under the weather,' because you were compassionate and objective.
Most of us often relate to our basic emotions as excess stash - one that triggers a sense of alarm, or trepidation, simply because someone is 'watching us closely.' This is an erroneous, if not tilted, belief. The best thing one could do is keep a close, unbiased watch on one's emotional intensity - more so, if one is high-strung, or the restless, nervous type. The reason is simple. Anyone who is restive, or edgy, would feel terrified when others don't 'emote' the feelings like they, perforce, do. The identical principle applies to people who emote feelings all too easily, when they find, or confront, someone who is rather 'cold' or 'guarded.' The world is full of either type - hence, the big question. Is there a middle Zen-like path, or a pragmatic way out of such frames of reference?
Yes, there is, provided we grasp at our empathetic straws and float on thoughtful gossamers. When we follow such a simple, yet powerful tenet, we embrace the light in us for a higher purpose - a revelation beyond our humdrum existence. It leads us to something which we all think of, but do not always connect to with adequate zest. You'd call it the divine principle, or mysticism. You may also think of it as your own spiritual roadmap, or mindful awareness - one that provides each of us with the essence of reality, or truth, and signifies every living thing in our wide, happening world. It equates to a melodic cadence in the mind, body, and soul of every individual - provided we listen to its serene rhythms in tranquillity, or solitude. It exemplifies our life's experiential journey, or transcendental extent of our being too - in other words, the glorious eternal effulgence of our spiritual dimension, or experience.
"Emotions," as Mark Goulston, the American psychiatrist, said, "are built on layers." They are part of us, also our social canvas, among others. We would all be uninteresting without the source of our emotions - a potent individual attribute in everything we do, or don't do. If behavioural scientists aver that our facial expressions and other parallel emotions influence the impression people have of us, their nuances, in like manner, hold good for the impression we have, or carry, of others. While it is believed that we use no more than one-fourth of our verbal communication skills, with words, the best part is we tend to use non-verbal facial expressions to the maximum. The reminder is left for body language and other gestures - which also 'emote' what we have in mind. This is, again, deciphered as 'conducive' or 'hostile,' as the case may be.
All said and done, the fact remains that many of us have not learned, or channelled the art of 'emoting' our emotions. We seem to 'ration' them, not express them fully - this is almost a 'lost' reserve. The point is the more we 'emote' our feelings - whatever they are - the more open and effective we will be. In addition, we care less, or don't think of the feelings of others. The reason being, we have, over time, suppressed our feelings, for whatever reason, so much so we have learned to 'markdown' the feelings of others. In an increasingly professional, corporate world - or, so we 'extol' - we are just too 'glued' to facts, or details, and not feelings involved in a given, or not given, situation.
You may certainly think of emotions as your 'sixth sense' - in line with sight, smell, touch, hearing and taste. Emotions are just as precious as sight and touch. It is rightly said that one who understands others understands oneself best and vice versa. This calls for nothing more than just a little bit of compassion, or understanding, to resolving disagreement and misunderstanding at every layer of your life. Emotions, when well expressed, not only bring relief, they also express empathy. Empathy is as powerful as any healing 'tool' - the more it is used, the better is one's intelligence, emotional and spiritual quotient.
Nidamboor is a wellness physician, independent researcher and author
